Insane in the Membrane

Trust me when I say that Michael and I feel badly when we harbor negative feelings towards our sickly daughter but she drove us INSANE today. 1 part "I'm feeling like shit from chemo" and 2 parts "I'm a strong-willed 3-year old" and there you have Sylvie. From repeat trips to the Morning Glory/ Hello Kitty store, two trips "searching" for stickers (that I hide in the trees when we go exploring outside) and preparing chicken fingers, fish sticks, egg wrap, french toast, toast with butter, macaroni and cheese, both American and mozzarella string cheese AT THE SAME TIME only to have Sylvie ask, "Can you make me the bunny macaroni and cheese?" followed by "I'm not hungry." When I returned with the toast for her to butter and got the 'not hungry' response, please don't hate me but I told her that I would stick it in her mouth if she didn't eat it on her own accord. Tears welled, cries for "Daddy" ensued and I had to walk away. As it turned out, Michael had been employing a similar tactic alternating with threats of sending Sylvie to her room. It was at this point we gave Sylvie a dose of Tylenol with Codeine. She ate half a slice of cheese and two bites of French toast. I don't know who needs the psychologist-- her or us! (Actually I've repeatedly asked about all this behavioral stuff and we've been assured we're handling it the 'right' way and that once Sylvie is healthy and back on a normal schedule, it should right itself except for the age-appropriate stuffs. Marianne, one of the APNs at HUMC did say that if the terrible two's were terrible, then the three's would be worse. Damn.

My cousin Rhonda brought over dinner last night with the promise that Michael and I would get to eat together and she would entertain Sylvie. I have to say, she is a charmer and Sylvie was totally enthralled with her. It was adorable listening to Sylvie say Rhonda this and Rhonda that while they made magic princess pictures. Rhonda gave Sylvie three glitter lip glosses which have not left Sylvie's little hands all day. She's clutching them in her sleep right now. Sylvie looked like a beauty queen all day with her shiny glittery pout. Even at Whole Foods this morning sometime around 9 am which brings me back to today's festivities.

I ran into my friend Jeanne at WF when we were trying to coerce Sylvie to eat anything. Gelato (thanks Mom for the freebie coupons!), egg and cheese on a croissant, you name it. Sylvie wouldn't eat a morsel and was pretty hostile to Jeanne (sorry...). There was a mom at the adjacent table in the cafe whose well-behaved daughter was dutifully eating cubes of cheese and grapes while staring at Sylvie. Michael barricaded the gelato so that the little girl wouldn't see it and then ask her mom for ice cream before 9 am. The mom GLARED at Michael obviously thinking what kind of parents are we to let our daughter eat ice cream before 9 am. Then she looked at skinny Sylvie with her thinning hair and made the obvious realization upon which she looked apologetically at us for the rest of their time in the cafe.

I think Michael and I need to end our day thinking about the 'warm fuzzies' especially when it's been filled with so many 'dim gloomies.' These are words my college roommate Jenny coined during our year living in the Pi Beta Phi sorority house on Langdon Street and before we went to sleep at night, we'd recap the day by listing the warm fuzzies and dim gloomies. You can never end the day on a dim gloomy. So from now on, Michael and I will not either! He's actually pointed out that my parent's rabbi during Shabbat services recaps all the GREAT things that happened in the prior week and that we should too. So here goes the warm fuzzies of the day and I will only briefly mention that Sylvie's constant harassing of Michael resulted in his screwing up his picks for the Belmont today (wink, wink):
1). Michael and I made a great corn and basil tart together
2). Sylvie "helped" make lemon cupcakes in ice cream cones and a birthday cake for our friend Mark
3). Our garden, after 4 days of rain, looks AMAZING
4). We made our first salad with bounty from our garden!
5). Jen brought over yummy chips, salsa and guac
6). Sylvie got a BATH
7). We got to celebrate our friend Mark's birthday
8). I got to hold baby Salvadorable until Sylvie got jealous
9). We had two uninterrupted hours to hang out

Tomorrow is the Tomorrows Children's Fund family day. Looking forward to being outside and maybe even getting Sylvie into a paddle boat!